Transsexual Smut - Review |
Transsexual Smuts is what you might call a mega site. And with most mega sites, you’re stuck with mega crap. T-Smuts (my new abbreviation for the site) is a place where exclusive content, 3rd party feeds, non-exclusive drek and negative-niche come together. When I say negative-niche, I mean there’s more stuff of a non-tranny nature than there is of a tranny nature. But why the mediocre grade for a less than mediocre site, you might be asking yourself. I hope you’re not asking yourself such questions, because it means you’re thinking too much and I get paid to think and review such mediocrity for you. The grade is because of the mega content included with a mega site of this nature. $4.95 for a 3-day trial or $6.95 for a 5-day trial isn’t bad. Unfortunately, it’s a limited trial, but you still get access to a bunch of stuff for a real cheap price.
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It’s extremely difficult for me to fault a site that spells “transsexual” correctly. Too often, I would come across transsexual with one “s” instead of the grammatically correct two “s’” and get really pissed off from the get-go. Unfortunately, Transsexual Smut doesn’t continue the trend of correct anything and lost me as an audience quite quickly.
The free tour section was one indication of things to come. You’re offered thumbnails of the models inside, but once you click on any one of them, you’re whisked away to the “Join Now or Else” page which reeks of desperation. Let me take my time to look around before I’m accosted with prices and trials and membership dues. The free trailers are another issue that needs to be looked at. If you’re going to include a trailer of a given model or video shoot, make sure it includes that particular model or couple in the trailer. Don’t give me the same marketing spiel in every one. It’s boring, misleading and insulting. Then again, naming your niche market “smuts” is insulting to begin with.
The only thing really done right in the tour section is including all of the possible shoots at the bottom of the page, neatly arranged in thumbnail format and bagged and tagged for immediate retrieval once you become a member. So often, sites forget or neglect to include the names of the models or the couples in a shoot and attempting to find them in the main members’ area is next to impossible. But once again, when you click on any of these shoots, you’re taken to the same “Join Now or Die” page that I cover so dearly.
Once inside after paying your dues, the main members’ page is a fiasco. You’re thrown “Featured Tranny Feeds” which are the worst 3rd party bottom-feeder sites ever assembled my man or she-man. Tranny Sex, Mr. & Mrs., Tranny Vision and Tranny City or a few of the offerings. It’s a bad sign… no, a real fucking bad sign when tranny feeds are your featured product.
Below this tranny-cheese, you’ll find the meat and potatoes of the site; the video and photo shoots. There aren’t any links or drop down menus to help you navigate, just in-your-face thumbnails with a really lousy interface. You get a thumbnail of some of the action which links nowhere, then the option to stream WMV videos in High (300k) or Low (150k) formats. The last time I checked, 300k was low and 150k was destined for the dust bin as it is primarily for bottom-feeding dial-up dinosaur customers. Then again, it’s always nice to cater to every level of the paying public, even the destitute level that has dial up.
You can also download the movies and watch 7 segments of 5 minutes each. Why not just lump them together since it’s less than 100 megs, is beyond me. And the quality of the 150k streamed clips is fucking awful. Thankfully, the option to download that crappiness is unavailable. But you do get the ability to download the slightly higher grade crappiness of 300k. Thankfully the main brunt of the site was exclusive. If it weren’t, I probably wouldn’t even be reviewing this waste of bandwidth space.
Don’t even get me started on the pictures. They’re what I like to call vid-craps for lowly quality pictures. Basically, a bored and bottom-dwelling Neanderthal is paid peanuts to press the pause button every time he or he-she sees a particularly riveting piece of porn. Often times, in this situation, heads are cut off and the action is blurred. Waste of fucking space and time.
But what you do get is access to some heavy-hitting sister sites of equaling appalling quality. Stuff like: Ass Then Mouth, Big Dicks Small Chicks, Deputy Dick, Erotic Smoking, Furry Pussies, Lesbian Kinks, My Naughty Nanny and a slew of others. But beware of the trial offers… the main part of each of these sites limit the downloads you can snatch from the site. You’ve been warned. Oy, have you been warned.
Conclusion
Another mega site, another colossal waste of time. But wait. Is it really? Do the cheap trial offers make monetary sense to come, conquer and cum some more? Doubtful if you’re looking for a tranny niche, but highly probably if hairy pussies, MILFs and other weird and wonderful shit is what you’re after. You want trannies? You might not find exactly what you’re seeking at Transsexual Smut.com. Looking for all sorts of free stuff to pilfer and pillage while you’re spending less than 10 bucks to access hoardes of whores? Then this is the place you’ll want to visit for 3 to 5 days. Just make sure you cancel before your trial is up, or you’re looking at an extra 30 bucks a month tapped on to your wife’s or girlfriend’s credit card. And don’t tell me you don’t use hers to make these silly purchases. You don’t? Too bad. I never pay for my porn. My babe always does. Thankfully, "CC Bill" on her statement looks a lot like "Credit Card Bill" if she were to take more than 2 seconds to peruse it. I'm gonna burn in hell, but have a shitload of fun getting there!
Price: $4.95 for 3-day limited trial, recurring; $29.96; $6.95 for 5-day limited trial, recurring at $29.96
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